好讨厌这样的自己~

好讨厌敏感的自己
好讨厌乱乱想的自己
好讨厌晚上睡不着的自己
好讨厌只会替别人瞎担心的自己
好讨厌不会为自己着想的自己
好讨厌不会推搪别人的自己
好讨厌不勇敢的自己
好讨厌假笑的自己



最讨厌故作坚强的自己。。。

~Ginny~
~11.34pm~

10.11.11

wow~
is about 1.26am now..
and i m still awake...
dark eye circle is getting darker..
but just dont know why, dont have the feeling of going to sleep now..
is not sleepy at all and dont wish to sleep...
kinda weird right? have time to sleep but dont wish to sleep...

well,i think start from today,i m having PMC mood swing..
mood is so easy to swing from very good mood to very bad mood..
i can easily get emo because of some words,maybe just because of a small,very small matter..
but i m sorry to tell that i am a VERY sensitive person..
please dont think that i never give any reaction means i am ok or i feel nothing..
just,i dont like to express my own feeling out..
when i express my own feeling out,i will feel so weird...
i also dont understand why..
just...dont like it..
but sometimes i wish other people would understand my feeling which i think is impossible for them because i never tell out my feelings...
sometimes i hate myself being so sensitive..
but this is me,i have to accept this...


actually i realised that many people like to zat me...
i wonder why they like to zat me..
is it because i gave them reaction when i zat by them?
and most of them answer yes...
but am i actually that FAT?? and do my face look like PIG?? and am i really that SHORT??
why everyone like to zat me with those words????!!!
i really dont understand!!
alright,i admit that i am not thin,but i am not as fat as 100kg!
although i am not that tall,at least i am 150 and above!!
then why always say i m fat and short???????
it do really hurts...
no one knows...
kinda sad right?
T^T...


well,just try to accept all those "comments" and change to motivation ba..
i will try my very best...


~Ginny~
~1.45am~